one more day..

Monday 4 May 2009

Suspense continues...waited for calls..a mail...

i have to end up this; since its haunting me lot...time is precious to where i want to concentrate at the moment its been diverted a level..

But i need an answer...so planning to meet her tomorrow..

Still....

Sunday 3 May 2009

Still...
No reply yet...every 15 minutes i have checked my mail..carried my phone to every where i go..(even in washroom, the point was don’t miss those calls or a text which i was expecting)..

Morning...noon..evening...& night...no response...lots of doubts dear..

Did she read the letter? or what will be the -ve part?
Restless evening...walked few miles.. sited alone..

No....thoughts are following me like anything..cant divert from it...how i gone into it,these much deeper?? Questions...Answers...fighting with my mind...

As i got an advise from my friend..you are going through its just “crush” !!

Is it? i asked my self several times...”NO” it is not a just crush...i’m sure..because i ever done anything in my life which feels “right” to myself...

Yet, after all these tensions; when i feels about her im getting immense of +ve energy which can beat all of my restlessness easier..

I didn't meet or see her after i given the letter; because i felt both of them need a breathing space & need time to decide..let have it...

However im loosing my hope when the each seconds or the second needle moves forward...

Finally ...

Saturday 2 May 2009

ooh god what have i done today? Whole day was nervous, woke up early ( night was sleepless)..yes i went to there by 12PM but before i have to met somebody which was urgent, after the meeting i thought need a relax since i was sweating unusual, seated on bench in shade of a tree..5min-10 min-15 min.. i ask why the time running fast ever than before...i could hear my heart beats..Dhak..Dhak..Dhak..its may broke the all perimeters today.. was it 200/min?

Ok.. Stand Up !!! i have given command to myself..few steps i reached the restaurant, she was right there at cash counter, but i didnt stand the “Q” which towards her..i choose the other one...
i was the last person on that line so usually she went out form the counter and involved in other jobs...3 or 4 times she passed near to me but i dont think she cared me... Idiot called myself because by nervous i ordered for big meal..i was hungry but i cannot take the meal the usual way..

took my phone and called my friend to kill my nervous in between she passed in front me, And given support to my next customer with beautiful smile...(ooh god... i need some oxygen...)

Finished my meal in hurry..went to wash..searched her she was right there at corner..after a while my foots started to head towards her...straight.... but took a left turn before few centimeter form her..i had a glass of water..just passed her and turn back n aks “hi what ur name” ? was there a fear on her eyes?? “......” ... ok...suddenly i took envelop and given to her .. i brought a message for you please read it when you get time...

I really wish i should have some magic to disappear from the scene....!! Acutely ran out from the shop..took and took a taxi..i never turned look back...

Now what? yes i’m expecting a reply..whether it -ve or +ve... waiting like ever than before i think i never worried these much even for my exam results..

Wrote a letter to her...

First of all thnx for the comment..yes i wrote a letter to her.. printed n put in a white cover and headed to her restaurant.. ooh man its huge rush there since its holiday today, that should be a bad move, so i had my food from other restaurant and went back to my waiting zone,, yes she came almost 11.15, just passed me, i tried to stair her but i guess i forgot to smile..i felt i'm receiving a -ve response; so again confused what to do, shall i give it or not?..its all happen in 5 minutes lap, before im getting any deception she left in bus..few seconds ... i feel very disappointed, lots of doubts..im i looking bad? or did i act as bad? or else did i made any bad move?... anyway feeling so sad, but decided to go tomorrow noon time directly to her restaurant, & will give the envelop to her by saying "dear i have a message for you"..feels at least i should have bolls to express my feelings.. whatever happens im going to do it tomorrow...

Waited...to see...(30/04/09)

Dear ( i dont know ur name)...

When i thought to go same restaurant to have food;but i had a different thought that wait her to finish her job, then speak freely, almost 2hr i need to wait; seated in front of MRT station,and hearing songs from mobile to kill the time..in regular intervals i checked the crowd of the hotel since i can see it from my distance.

I may missed that lap..when i took eyes from the phone..i saw she just passing me..she may see me also...got freezed; didn't have any idea what to do;after a while a followed her, she were standing at the bus station to catch her bus..i crossed her very close..didnt get the courage even speak to her...ooh god...what i do..

A sooth feel ... (29/04/09)

There was a feeling from the last one week...a flow of something i cant express by words...i was searching the face in komala villas by two days..but today..i saw it close...i couldn't stare too long..i placed the order from her & choose a seat, which i can see her directly..but suddenly she came close and gave my order(to me only & went back to cash counter).. i feel to ask her name at-least, but i couldn't..

I dont know who is she, where is she from.. only one song in my heart.. just listen it.....